Nebraska Family Forum

When our oldest daughter was 11 she starting having debilitating headaches and I took her to the doctor over and over again only to receive the same diagnosis, allergies that caused terrible sinus infections. Her allergies would lead to sinus problems that would in return cause horrific headaches and weakness. When she started to develop ear infections, we took her to see an ENT who was concerned. He said kids this age don't usually develop chronic ear infections. He ordered a CAT scan of her head and found what he said was the worst case he had ever seen on Nasal polyps. Surgery would need to be done immediately to remove them. After the surgery the doctor said he had stopped counting after 100 polyps. Recovery time took awhile but she was eventually back to school and feeling quite better.

Unfortunately, that didn't last long. After a month or so her allergies returned in full force as well as the sinus problems. Cystic fibrosis testing was done but did not provide us with any answers. We spent the next 2 years taking her specialist after specialist. We went to ENT's, Pulmonologist, Allergist, even chiropractors. As you can imagine our daughter missed school often during these years, but the Millard schools did a fantastic job of working with us. Our daughter did well in school and we were happy with the arrangements we had made for her.

School was one of her favorite things, she is involved in band, student council, numerous after school activities. When she was Healthy she was full of life throwing herself into any afterschool club she could. When she was sick she would lay in bed in a dark room all day sleeping battling her headaches. On April of 2010 we received a letter from the Sarpy county attorney saying we would need to appear in court regarding her absences.

Being caught up in the juvenile court system has been a nightmare for our family, especially for our beautiful sweet daughter. Our daughter has always been a happy, sweet and shy kid but a lot of fun. The day we sat with her court appointed attorney and were told that the judge had decided to put our daughter on probation was devastating. My little girl turned to me and began to cry. She said, “Mom, what did I do wrong!”

My daughter is a naturally obedient child. She wants to know that she is being good, doing the right thing. This process is breaking her. I have watched in horror as my daughter’s innocence and carefree nature has been stripped away. This has changed her personality. That they had made her feel like a criminal and she has begun to doubt herself wondering it maybe she was a bad kid.

She was interviewed by a probation officer to get “her side of things” and we were made to stay in the waiting room even at our protest. We found out later that our daughter was made to urinate in a cup for a drug test during the meeting. I was enraged! We weren't even told this was going to happen. I feel violated!

Some state officials have said that the schools hold most of the power, that upon their recommendation these cases are handled. I don’t believe them. My school has been nothing but concerned about what is happening to us. My principal has tried to protect us. In my experience there is nothing anyone can do once you fall into the system. It just has to play out and if your child continues to be absent it makes it harder to get out of the system.

I cannot prevent my daughter’s illnesses and I cannot cure them. In an attempt to keep my daughter from having continued attendance issues, my principal is having me send her to school sick and they are keeping her in a sick room. When she is sick but has no fever she stays in her IEP's teacher's room. It is a smaller room that stays quiet most of the day. She works on her homework and takes little naps, she even eats lunch there. This way they can count her present, but she can rest. I am sick about it, why shouldn’t my sick daughter be able to be home with me in her own bed. What is wrong with this picture?

We have given up everything normal and natural about our lives, we have given up our privacy. We now send our daughter to school sick to be cared for by a school nurse instead of her stay-at-home mother. We are sharing our daughter’s complete medical history with any school or state official who wants to see it. I even had my school social worker come with me to one of my daughter’s doctor’s appointments in hopes that her testimony might help us.

It’s sickening to me that I feel compelled to do these things, but I just want this to end. I want my daughter to get back to the way she was before this awful law turned our lives upside down! I keep thinking that if I just cooperate they will let us go and leave us alone, but I don’t know anymore. I have very hateful feelings towards the people who wrote this law, and those who passed it, and especially those who continue to defend it.

I’ve heard several state officials and lawmakers refer to the law as a “work in progress”, and one senator said that though “he acknowledged there have been problems in a few cases” he believes the positive aspects of the law outweigh those. I literally want to cry. I can’t believe that they believe that my family is an acceptable casualty in their plans, that my innocent daughter is a guinea pig in their experiment and that doesn’t bother them.

The way I see it, some do-good government officials passed a law designed to take out of the hands of parents, principals, and even doctors the discretion over school attendance in an attempt to provide legal oversight in all cases with the justification of “preventing” delinquent behavior among certain groups of children. In the process they have usurped that natural rights of parents, thrown innocent children into the juvenile justice system, and disrupted the healthy and happy childhoods of children like my daughter. Their error is intolerable and unforgivable.

Jennifer Chambers
Millard School District
Omaha, NE

Update!

After some deep thought between my husband and I, we have reached a decision The state of Nebraska has drained us. Finacialy, Emotionaly, and Physicaly Maddie has been emotionaly scarred and now carries a nasty ulcer brought on by the stress. My MS has gone in overload with everything that has happeded. We have decided to leave the state..... My husband has agreed to transfer to North Carloina with his company. NC will do well for Maddie's allergies. We just need a fresh start. I want to personaly thank everyone for being there for us. Stephanie Smith Morgan you have been a shining light for us in such dark times....I can't express how thankfull I am to have had you here for us. Keep Fighting! Gold Bless